This is only my 2nd attempt at Thoughts for Thursday, but this topic just came up today so I figured it would be worth throwing it out there.
*Daycare* :-)
I know this topic is something a lot of parents have to think about and consider for their children when they return to work.
I was talking to my friend today (Hi Polly) who is starting a new job. She is switching from 3rd shift to 1st, in an effort to normalize her time with her family so she is putting her 2 youngest (9months and 3 yrs) into daycare. We got talking about a blog that I had read about a family where their son had been shook by a babysitter they trusted. Then there are other horror stories that make it to the media, you know the one where the "nanny" is throwing the twin babies around carelessly and mishandling them. I am disgusted with this behavior just as much as the next person.
When it came time for us to choose a daycare for Carson I went with a place where I felt very comfortable. I didn't need to do a lot of seaching because I knew what HIS needs were. With our older daughter (kenedey now 11 yrs old) it was tough to find the "right" daycare for her. She had very different needs. By that I mean she was more emotional (yes even very young) she needed snuggled A LOT, she was pretty demanding etc. Where Carson was just active, we knew he needed to have a stimulating environment and also a lot of structure.
The thoughts I am interesting in what you all think is this: When choosing daycare: do you get a "feeling" that the place is right for your child? How would you feel if your provider said to you, "I am sorry I don't feel like your child is a good fit for here"? What is most important to you when you are looking for childcare... family, friends, environment, schedule, or what?
I am just curious about this. Polly and I were talking about some of the terrible things that happen in daycares/home daycares and we were just like.... why can't a provider just say, "Look, your child cries too much for me, or your child doesn't fit, or something like that.... before/rather than hurting or being mean to a child.
NOW BELIEVE ME... I know there are wonderful people out there who do daycare. Lots of them really. I have been fortunate to have had wonderful people care for my children while I worked outside the home, so please do not think I am ripping on daycares by ANY means. I am actually on the flip side now where I watch a friends children and I absolutely love these kids like they are my own. However, if that weren't the case. I can honestly say, I WOULD let a parent know if it wasn't a "good fit". I have thought about opening my home to more kids, however, I think it would be more of a chore then, rather than something I enjoy. I don't ever want to have kids I am responsible for unhappy in my care. It's really important to me since my kids are also here. If the kid I am watching is unhappy... so am I... and for my kids, an unhappy mommy is a crappy mommy! That's just my take! Shoot some of your thoughts!
Other TFT blogs: ( I know I read more today... do you think I can find them... ugh, sorry if I forgot you, leave me a message so I can add you to the list!)
Heather
Kim
Michelle
Jenny
Thursday, April 24, 2008
TFT: (Thoughts for Thursday)
Posted by karicarp at 2:07 PM
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2 comments:
This is a tough topic for me since I know the person you are referring to personally. I am horrified about her situation, and although I know that there are more caring people out there than not, you just really don't know. I have been very fortunate to be at home with my kids for most of their lives. Annika was in daycare for only 6 months (6-12) and for most of the time, I taught preschool there. I was able to keep a close eye on everything and I annoyed the crap out of her teachers. But, I am the mom and I have the control and always will when it comes to the care of my children.
Just recently I had to hire a nanny while I was on bedrest. I just knew she was the one. She fit with my kids. I felt awkward hiring her right away just because I felt I should be more cautious, but I just knew so why would I wait?
Childcare is scary, you are leaving the lives of your children to someone else. It's hard to replace yourself when you can't be there. I don't envy people who have to do this. I am so grateful I am able to stay home.
for the first year of tucker's life, we were lucky to have our family members watch him. i only had 8 weeks off with him when he was born, and 2 of them were spent in the nicu. it was so much easier to go back to work knowing he was with family.
after his frist birthday, i put him in the only daycare center in our town. my cousin worked there and i knew some of the other ladies (and kids) and felt fine about him being there, but he still wasn't walking and was kind of clingy so i always felt bad leaving him there. it was a hard change. the seperation anxiety didn't help either. then something awesome happened...
my best friend told me the family her sister nannied for was moving. about five minutes after she told me this i called her sister and asked her if she would be interested in watching tucker in our home. it started out part-time, but now she is our full-time nanny and comes to our house m-f while my hubby and i work. tucker LOVES her and her husband. they are perfect and i could not love her more for the way she is with my child. i am very lucky to be able to have someone i have known for a long time care for my child.
i know there are many awesome daycares out there, but you can't help but wonder what pushes some of these providers/nannies over the edge. so scary and i'm thankful i've never had to deal with that kind of a situation.
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